Anticipation: what it means and how to respond

A feeling pointed at the future

Anticipation is counting the days to a concert, picturing the first bite of a holiday meal, or imagining how the conversation with your landlord will go. It has a clear target and a sense of time: something is coming, and you are already living a bit of it.

Anticipation itself is neutral. Its color depends on what you expect. Looking forward to a beach trip and bracing for a performance review are both anticipation.

How anticipation shows up

Eager anticipation often brings restlessness, smiling at nothing, checking the calendar, and daydreaming. Uneasy anticipation looks more like rehearsing, tension, and trouble focusing. Many people feel both in the hours before a big event like a wedding or a move.

Anticipation can also be shared, which often makes it stronger. A family counting down to a reunion, coworkers talking about a launch, or two friends planning a road trip all feed each other's sense of what is coming. Shared uneasy anticipation works the same way, which is why a whole office can get tense before layoffs are announced.

Why the waiting can be the best part

In five experiments, Van Boven and Ashworth found that people reported more intense emotions when looking forward to events, such as Thanksgiving or a ski vacation, than when looking back on them, partly because they imagined future events more fully (Van Boven and Ashworth, 2007). That suggests a practical idea: planning something enjoyable weeks ahead gives you weeks of pleasure, not just the day itself.

Anticipation also signals what you are invested in. If you find yourself thinking about a project at night, that is information about what matters to you, or about what is worrying you.

Anticipation, excitement, apprehension, and hope

Excitement is anticipation with high energy and a positive expectation. Apprehension is anticipation with unease. Hope adds uncertainty: you anticipate a good outcome that might not come. Plain anticipation can be calm, such as looking forward to a regular Sunday call.

Example: the trip in March

In a gray January, Leah and her partner book a long weekend for March. Instead of forgetting about it until the week before, they put a photo of the town on the fridge and pick one restaurant to try each week from a list. “Six weeks to go,” Leah texts on a rough Monday. The trip is still months off, but January feels lighter.

Three ways to use anticipation

1. Plan pleasant things ahead of time rather than at the last minute, so you get the waiting period too.
2. Feed eager anticipation with small details: a photo, a playlist, a countdown.
3. For uneasy anticipation, pick one preparation step and then set the event aside until it is time, rather than rehearsing it over and over.

Words you could use

• “Six weeks to go. It's getting me through this month.”
• “I keep picturing how it'll go. Can I tell you about it?”
• “Let's book it now so we have something to look forward to.”

A reflection prompt

What am I looking forward to right now, and if the answer is nothing, what small thing could I put on the calendar?

The EQTiger dimension it relates to

Anticipation relates to Emotional Self-Awareness: noticing whether your forward-looking thoughts are eager or uneasy, and what they say about what matters to you. Read what the self-awareness score describes.